The biggest obstacle to happiness and how to overcome it ⚡️👇🏻 ☀️Apr 24, 2023
Do you know what the biggest obstacle to happiness is? The pursuit of perfection.
This tireless pursuit creates comparison, lack, doubt, fear, shame and blame. All things we really can do without.
Also all things we can fundamentally reset our mindset on if we are willing. Call it your mental gym. What do you exercise the most.....?
Are you your harshest critic? (nods yes)
Constantly being tough on yourself or others as well - not meeting your expectations. (nods yes).
DO you find that you tell yourself and others you will be happy when.......or that you've just got to get through xyz then it will all be ok?
- "Everything will be great when. XYZ happens...."
- "I will take the step with blah blah blah gets sorted."
- "I will be happy when...."
- "I can't be happy yet because...."
- "You don't understand...."
Tigger warning ahead, if you have recently lost someone suddenly please read on with a gentle lens and I am truly sorry for your loss...
...Last week I learned that of one of my most fabulous kind clients and friend, has tragically lost a young and vibrant former employee in a horrific accident. At age 31. She stepped out of her car on the way to court and was fatally hit. An unbelievable loss. Our deepest sympathies to everyone that knew T. I really wasn't sure whether or not to write about this today - but I feel to honour people is to share their memories and keep their story and passion for life alive. You can't prepare for this type of thing at any age or moment in life.
It is a radical reminder that life is so precious.
Why do we wait for these horrific wake up calls in order to say "I choose the now".
Yes have your goals - your vision, your creation you are working towards. I am a firm believer in defining what you want. YET: Don't forget....
The most important part is ENJOY THIS JOURNEY. This mad, crazy world of meetings, meet ups, interest rates, online shopping, traffic, business deals, wins, losses, love, laughter, health and not so healthy moments, tears, courage, fear, the fight - all of it. Embrace it all. Then every day. Look up. You are here. Alive, living, doing, being, becoming.
Do not wish this time to rush by on the way to another goal that will "get you closer to your happy".
CHOOSE HAPPY NOW.
Even if things are not perfect. Just know - you are enough. We already have so much. It is enough.
If you're forever trying to find that blend to do what you love, be what you love and have what you love then you're not alone. Let this be a gentle recipe to change the perspective to be one of immense gratitude for wherever you are on your life and career pathway.
My biggest joy? Is being 100% completely happy with whatever I have now, right at any given second. Even when stuck in traffic - that is one of my biggest frustrations - I learn to find the peace and gratitude and use that time wisely.
The point is life is choice. not chance. Be here, be present. Soak it up. I can't get back moments that I would love to spend with my father, I can't turn back time on mistakes - I can only lean in and learn from it all.
Being grateful for the now builds a solid foundation for the next. Whatever book or course you pick up of mine it will have all the tools in there for achieving this - BE THE CEO OF YOUR LIFE by focusing on what you think about and say to yourself daily.
The fastest way to being happy is to stop comparing what you have now with anything and anyone else. Drop the "should". Drop the criticism, judgement and idealism of yourself and others.
Once you set your goals wholeheartedly enjoy the day and follow through on living your best life on the way there.
If nothing else - read this as a radical reminder to swap perfection for progress.
Like... literally practice this as your new mantra and I promise you a whole new world of possibilities will open up.
In memory of Telise. Vibrant, intelligent and kind.